Tired

I am so tired. I have ZERO energy. I am convinced, or at least hoping now, that my first trimester is not over. Because, if it is over, then I am in my second trimester and I am NOT getting the energy and generally “feel-goodness” that every previously pregnant woman has told me about. Please tell me it’s coming soon. I cannot live like this. I am working full time but also taking two classes. I am taking Anatomy and Physiology I with a lab and a communications course. The communication course is online and I can deal with it, but A&P I is seriously kicking my butt. I know this is only the beginning as I am going back to school to become an RN but the pregnancy part of the equation is making everything seem harder than it really is. I tidyed up the house a little bit last night (as in I put the dishes in the sick into the dishwasher and picked up trash and dirty clothes around the house) and you would have thought I had just run 5 miles! I was exhausted! My house is an embarrassment right now, but I really don’t have the energy to do anything about it, so I am trying to get over it. Here are some new pics from my 11^th and 12^th weeks....(I've only gained 2 pounds, but my belly is definitely protruding.)

11 weeks

12 weeks

I’m too tired to write anything else! OH, and one more thing, I am certain that no one understands what it means to truly be tired until they are pregnant! Trust me, you have no idea! (If you know what’s good for you, you won’t argue with a pregnant woman. J )

Day off.....Off day

Yesterday I had a day off, or rather a comp day. I work one Saturday a month and when I work a Saturday, I get a comp day either the week before that Saturday or the week after. I will unfortunately be working this Saturday. I had some errands I wanted to get done, but the thing I most wanted in the world was to take an afternoon nap. I love naps. Always have, and I think I always will. I especially wanted one now that I am pregnant.


So I got up at 7:30am and had my quiet time and then took the dogs for a walk. I ate half a bagel before walking and I started to spike (double arrows up on the dexcom with a 132 reading). Knowing that walking in the mornings usually increases my blood sugar, I checked my sugar to confirm the dexcom, took the full correction bolus and proceeded with my walk. After being home for about 15 minutes, I started to drop. I ate some jelly beans to try to even out the drop, but then the dexcom blared at me with a 79 and double arrows down. I checked my sugar and I’m at 64, so I ate some more jelly beans and waited 15 minutes. I check again and I’m at 41, blah!!! I go get a juice box, sit there for another miserable 15 minutes, and I’m finally back at in the 60s and increasing. Whew, what a fun morning.

I head to the dry cleaners. I drop my clothes off at the dry cleaners and then head to Target. I took back a dress I bought and decided I didn’t need (or really want). So I return the dress and at this point I should have headed out of the store, but I just had to see what was available in maternity. I actually bought my first pair of maternity pants! They were on clearance for $14.95 and they were basic black dress pants, come’ on I had to buy them. I bought a notebook (for my Anatomy and Physiology lab) and proceeded to checkout. In the checkout line, I feel it coming, another low. I look the candy over and grab a small package of gummy bears. Once I’m in the car I check my sugar and sure enough I am in the 60s again. I eat 8 gummy bears at 2 grams of carb each for a total of 16 carbs and I’m on my way.

I get home and I’m starving and ready for lunch. It’s only 11:30am. I check my sugar and I’m now at 123 and according to the dexcom arrow, I’m climbing. BOO!!! I take my bolus and fix my lunch: chunky peanut butter and sugar free strawberry jelly on whole wheat, an Asian pear (thanks Kerri!), and some green peas. (I know this may sound like a weird pregnancy meal, but it’s really not out of the ordinary for me.) I wait another 15 minutes because my arrow is still going up slightly. I can’t wait anymore, I’m starving!

I have an endocrinologist appointment at 1pm. I get ready and head out with a 130 and level arrow on my dexcom. I sit and wait and wait and wait. My endo is never on time or even 30 minutes from being on time. It’s always at least an hour in the waiting room. I am stuck on the dexcom at 140, I check twice within the hour and take the recommended boluses and I finally start to come down. I saw the endo and I have gained 2 pounds and my A1C was 5.3%. That’s about all the endo is good for in my opinion.

By the time I get home it’s 3:15pm and I have a hair appointment at 4:30pm and it takes 30 minutes to get there. So…no nap for me today. But I did get my hair done which always makes me feel good.

It was just one of those days where I didn’t feel like I had a day off but rather I had an off day…ha ha. When diabetes is constantly messing with you, it’s a full time job all on its own.

First Trimester Fun

I’m sick of crying uncontrollably. I have NEVER been what you would call a “crier.” I mean don’t get me wrong, I cry at really sad movies and songs, but I’ve never been this emotional. These days I can cry at the drop of a hat. I can’t listen to country music for more than 10 minutes without sobbing uncontrollably. I cry multiple times every Sunday at church. I even cried when Cary and I were teaching preschool Sunday school the other day and it was nothing to cry over. We were in children’s chapel and one of the little girls saw her daddy and jumped up and kept waving at him and saying “that’s my daddy” and smiling so big, it made me melt…..and cry. I knew pregnancy was supposed to cause all these emotions but I was thinking these emotions happened to “other people.” Not me.


I’m also very sensitive. NOT LIKE ME. I am one who appreciates sarcasm, I love it in fact. But, lately, I am overly sensitive to even joking remarks. I can’t handle it. The baby has apparently found my sarcasm button and turned it to off.

Something else I just discovered is there seems to be some controversy over what is really the end of your first trimester. I have been using the pregnancy calendar via “justmommies.com” and it has stated that the end of your first trimester is the 12 week mark. Now, I find out from another site that they use the 14th week as the end of the first trimester. I guess if you divide the 40 weeks of pregnancy by 3, you would get 13.3, so that would technically be the end of the first trimester. Not sure which my doctor uses. Oh well, for now I’m sticking with my pregnancy calendar which means the first trimester is over Thursday!

Football Season

I cannot wait for football season to start. I am a HUGE football fan. I love all football, but I especially love college football, specifically SEC college football. Football season is almost here and that means football weekends that start on Thursday nights and don’t end until Monday night…I mean does it get any better?!



I am a HUGE Alabama football fan. That’s right, I love the Crimson Tide! I have an affection for my team that most would call “unhealthy” (mainly my husband). I love this team so much that if they aren’t on TV, I will listen on radio. I love this team so much that I must watch the game in “real-time”, (no DVR, because if I am cheering for my team, it obviously does not do any good if I am rooting for something that has already happened) but once the game is over, I will watch the game at least 1 to 2 more times (granted we win) on DVR. I love this team so much that I will change my shirt at halftime if we are loosing (because obviously my shirt is the cause of their demise). I love this team so much that I dress my dogs in their game day bandanas before every game. I love this team so much that I have watched the replays of the BCS Championship game several times (most recently ESPNU just showed it last night.:)


I am also excited about football because with football comes fall. I love fall. It is my favorite season. I love the cool weather, the warm foods (such as chili) and the fall clothing. I love wearing jackets, scarves and sweaters, not the winter ones where you are all covered up except for your eyes, but the cute ones you wear when it’s crisp outside (see, I am a girl, in case you thought differently due to my fanatic love of football).


As much as I’m looking forward to fall and football, I am looking forward to the coming season even more because it means the start of my second trimester! Hopefully some of the constant exhaustion will ease a bit. Here’s hoping at least! My second trimester officially starts August 26th.


Happy (so-to-be) football and fall, Y’all!!!

Saturday Night

Saturday night was a really fun night. We went over to a friend’s house and ate dinner and played games. It was great. My PDM (personal diabetes machine, the remote that controls my pod) had been going off every hour alerting me to the fact that my pod (pump) had expired and needed to be changed. I know from experience that I have at least a good 4-5 hours with an expired pod (granted I have ample supply of insulin), so I ignore it and plan to change it when I get home.


When we get home at 11pm, I change my pod and my site to the area right above my butt; I guess you would call it lower than my lower back towards my hip area. I do my normal increase of temporary basal and a small bolus to make sure things are flowing good and head to bed (with my dexcom monitoring as well). I wake up at 2:30am with a vibrating buzz alerting me that I am at 160, I take my blood sugar to confirm, take a bolus and go back to sleep, hoping it’s not a bad site. I wake up at 5:00am to another buzz but this time I am at 220….no good at all, must be a bad site, which means another pod change, woo hoo!!! And, at 5 in the morning, double woo hoo! So I check my blood sugar to confirm my dexcom and heck yeah, I’m high (not that I couldn’t tell already by the fact that it felt like someone had stuffed cotton balls in my mouth while asleep). I give myself an injection before my pod change so I know my blood sugar will come down quickly, regardless of my pod issues. So, I change my pod (blood comes gushing out confirming my bad site suspicions), do my temp basal and bolus and drink a whole lot of water. I stayed up for an hour and checked my blood sugar twice to make sure I was coming down and my dexcom confirmed with a nice downward arrow. :) I went back to sleep, good pod, good sugars, end of story, right?! Oh, how I wish that was the end of my story….

I began dreaming when I went back to sleep at 6am and I had a very vivid dream. I dreamt I had to go to the bathroom really, really bad. In my dream, I ran around this huge public restroom, running into random people from high school along the way. Some of the stalls I went into had no toilet, so I kept running around the bathroom and finally found a toilet. I run in and being to well, use the restroom……this is where I wake up in my bed and I’m Peeeeeeing!!!! Yes, that’s right, I peed in my bed. Luckily, I woke up before I was completely finished and was able to make it to the bathroom. I couldn’t believe what I had done. You may be thinking, oh gosh, what about poor Cary, well it was 7:30am and Cary was already awake getting ready for church, so luckily he was not in the bed at the time of said incident. I went downstairs to tell him what had happened. We both laughed so hard, I was crying and I have to admit, I still think it’s pretty hilarious. Good Times!

Belly Pictures

Here are a few of the belly pics we've taken so far....

This was the day we found out we were pregnant. I had my pod on my belly at the time. (Yes, I am a robot.)

This next picture is at 6 weeks, I thought I was at 7 at the time, but after having my first ultrasound, we found out I was a week behind what they originally thought.....

Babycenter.com said at 7 weeks your baby is the size of a blueberry, but I was really 6 weeks, so pretend I'm holding a lentil :) 

I wasn't feeling so great for the next few weeks, so I don't have another picture until 9 weeks....

9 weeks, please forgive the background of our messy office. :) 

And, now the most recent belly picture, at 10 weeks....

Yes, I think I definitely have a little pooch, not that I couldn't tell already by my tight waisted pants. 

There you go, that's my pregnancy so far. Many, many more pictures to come as Betus-the-Fetus grows and my belly continues to expand. :)

10 Weeks

Today I am 10 weeks pregnant! YAY, finally in the double digits! My nausea has gotten much, much better, but really I shouldn’t complain because it wasn’t that bad to begin with (I never threw up, woo hoo!!). I think the main cause of my nausea was more my blood sugars than morning sickness. Trying to keep them steady is very difficult and I’ve had some low, lows (which can make you feel nauseous) and some rebound highs that basically make you feel like you are on a rollercoaster you never wanted to get on. It has taken a lot of adjustments, constant monitoring, juice boxes, and correction boluses, but at least for the moment I’m feeling good. The hormones of pregnancy, the growing baby and my own changing body make each week and sometimes each day, unpredictable.  I am working with an educator biweekly at my endocrinologist who helps me make insulin adjustments to my pump. It’s so nice to have someone to work with and just not feel so alone in all the daunting changes. It is really mind boggling just how much I’ve reduced my insulin since week 7. It’s hard to get used to seeing those low basal rates and insulin to carb ratios. I had so much insulin resistance from the time I found out I was pregnant until week 7, that I almost believed the lows would never arrive. I know resistance will be back at some point, but for now, I’m enjoying the low amounts of insulin.

 I had my second doctor’s appointment on Monday and everything looks perfect. They weighed me, checked my urine, and my blood pressure. Everything was perfect. The doctor was also able to hear the baby’s heartbeat through my belly. It was in the 160s so he’s predicting a girl (but noted not to go paint the nursery pink just yet).  He was very pleased with all my lab results and gave me a grade of an A+ and he said he doesn’t give those out very often.  I was beaming with pride! I don’t have another doctor’s appointment until September 9^th, so it will seem like forever before I can get another checkup on Betus.

Speaking of Betus, it seems she’s/he’s spreading out. I haven’t gained any weight on the scale but I swear my tummy is protruding. I bought a belly band so I don’t have to button my pants (fabulous!). Cary (my husband) said he wanted one too, but I think that may be a bad idea. J I’m seeing maternity clothing in my near future. I’m already partial to dresses, I don’t like anything (including elastic) on my stomach, It’s just not nearly as comfortable as a free flowing, unbinding, moo-moo….ok so it’s not a moo-moo but it doesn’t touch my belly, so it’s fantastic.

I am still pretty hormonal (just ask Cary) but I’m really trying to not be so crazy. It’s really hard though. I have no patience! My new saying is “Pregnancy does not breed patience.” Hopefully Cary will let me slide on some of the craziness; I am creating a human life after all. J The hormones are also making me cry at every sappy commercial. The latest favorite is the Subaru one. The dad is talking to his daughter through the window of the car as the car sits in the driveway ready to back out. The dad tells her things like don’t text while driving, stay off the freeways, etc, and then you see the girl in the driver’s seat is a 5 year old girl. Once she actually turns the key to start the car, she’s a teenager and her dad looks lovingly at her like he still sees the 5 year old girl, aahhhh, it gets me every time! I’m crying just describing it to you, seriously, I’ve got issues! Hopefully, I’ll get it together soon or it’ll get worse, who knows?!

Dear Baby

Dear Baby,

I have been thinking about you for a long time. I thought for a while in my life, that I didn’t really need to have a child to be happy, but I know I was mostly talking myself out of it because I knew how hard it would be. Now, knowing you are inside my little belly, blows my mind. I can’t believe how quickly you came into our lives once we decided to give it a try. I woke up June 29th, and I just felt like you might be there. I took the test and waited with your daddy while the test did it’s thing. Your daddy was actually the first to see the test, as he ran past me to the bathroom so he could see it first. He looked over at me as I walked in and with a big grin on his face said, “You’re Pregnant!”

This is the actual first positive test. We took one more later that day. 

I am beyond thrilled but also scared. I am doing everything I can to protect you and take care of you while you are living in my belly. It’s only the beginning but it’s already hard. The regular pregnancy stuff like hormones and nausea, make it much harder for your diabetic mommy.

I’ve had two doctors appointments so far and everything looks good. I got to peek in on you at 7 weeks (I think you still had a tail at that point) and hear your heart beat for the first time (142 beats a minute). You looked and sounded good. And today, at 9 weeks, 4 days I had my second appointment. Everything still looks good and I got to hear your heartbeat again, this time the heart rate was in the 160s! So relieved to hear that sound!

My pants started to get a little tight last week and I’ve been wearing a belly band to give you plenty of room to spread out. I can’t wait until you make yourself more pronuounced with an official bump! You aren’t due until March, which seems light years away, but I know it will go by so fast. I am trying to cherish every minute, without worrying every minute, and I am doing the best I can.

I am doing, and will do, everything I can to protect you. You are so wanted and so loved by your daddy and I. We can’t wait to meet you! We love you!

Love,

Your Mommy

Seeing Signs

I think I may have been on my dexcom (continuous glucose monitor) too long. But actually I have only been on it for about 3 months. Now when I see street signs, especially interstate signs with arrows underneath, I think of my CGM. 

You see, the CGM shows a graph and on the upper right hand corner a number with an arrow underneath. The arrows tell you how fast you are dropping or rising. 

Not only do I think of my CGM when I see these signs, I also think about the corresponding feeling associated with that number and arrow. For example, when I see an Interstate 65 sign (which is the sign I most often see in Louisville, KY) with a down arrow, I think yowsers, that is going to be a really crappy low and I better get some juice fast! I think being pregnant has made me look at this thing about every 5-10 minutes, it’s making me crazy!

Crazy Person

Today I had my first real pregnancy hormonal breakdown, or rather blow up. I woke up and rolled over to grab my crackers before getting out of bed (as has become the custom since morning sickness started) only to find I had forgotten my crackers downstairs the night before. UGH!!! There was no way I could even sit up, much less get out of bed without anything in my stomach. No problem, I’ll just call my husband who is downstairs and he’ll bring them up to me, problem solved, right?! I called, no answer. I called again, no answer. Ok, I’ll call his other number, no answer. Ok, I’ll try his cell phone again, no answer. So, here I lie in agony and I can’t yell for him because I know he will never hear me over the TV. And, if I do try to yell I’d probably spew all over myself. So, I lie in agony for about 15 minutes trying to make myself get out of bed. I finally do get out of bed and walk downstairs to find my husband in his office with the door cracked, TV blaring. I pop open the door and greet him with “Why don’t you answer your freakin’ phone!?” He looks back at me startled and grabs his phone out of his pocket and explains it was on vibrate and he didn’t feel it. I just glared back. He asks why I was calling him to which I explained the nausea situation. I continue with my morning, grabbing some crackers before getting in the shower. I am miserable even after my shower and I just sit in the bathroom feeling sorry for myself. Then, after a couple of minutes, I get even more mad about the not answering the phone incident, and my anger grows even more when I realize he hasn’t even checked on me and I can hear him laughing hysterically watching “The cable guy.” How dare he enjoy himself when I am unwell?! I go into the room and sit on the bed while exhaling loudly. He turns to look at me and asks “what’s wrong?” I simply say “I don’t like you very much right now.” His face is complete confusion. I explain that I need him to be there for me, even when I don’t ask. He explains that he is trying and is sorry. I start crying and tell him I’m sorry for being crazy. I tell him “I love you.” And he replies the same. I leave for work. First pregnancy blow up down, how many more to go? Being a crazy person is exhausting.